I'd like to be in bed by 10:30 or 11:00, but lately, I haven't been able to go to bed until well after midnight. There have been some nights where I didn't feel drowsy until 3:30am.
Maybe my mind is overstimulated, and there's just too many things whirling around in it for me to relax enough to get in a sleep mindset. It seems that the only cure is to just surf the Net until the wee hours, or watching DVD or YouTube videos until I can't keep my eyes open anymore.
Some of this may be a subconscious attempt to avoid my evening prayers. Tonight in particular, since in addition to my usual prayers (three psalms, a scripture passage, a canticle, intersessions, and a closing prayer), I need to say some special prayers that the priest gave me as penance during Confession. Even if I blow off my regular prayers, I HAVE to say my penance (three Hail Marys, and a prayer to St. Philomena, and I just remembered that I needed to pray a Rosary as well). It's bad enough that I skipped Eucharistic Adoration today (had all good intentions of going after the gym, but I was uber-sweaty, and by the time I showered and dressed, then had some dinner, it was after 8:00). My prayer life has really been in the crapper. I don't see how I expect to become a monk if I can't even maintain a simple daily discipline of morning and evening prayers, and Mass and adoration.
Just got an email from one of my store managers. I think she may even top me in email length and meticulousness. I'll have to put her on ice for a little bit tomorrow; she can be a bit much first thing in the morning.
Good God, this laptop is warm! I had it resting on my leg for the past five minutes, and I'm sweating. It's actually a bit red from where the blood was rushing to the surface on my thigh. I think I may need to break out the chillpad to cool it down when I'm using it for long periods of time.
It's 12:35; let's see what's on TV:
Will and Grace
The Insider (Pat O'Brian)
Infomercial for exercise equipment
Infomercial for real estate
Opera documentary on PBS
Stargate SG-1 (ironically, an episode where the team is infected by a sleep-inducing parasite)
OK, so it's not a total wasteland. Maybe watching SG-1 will lull me to sleep.