I'm getting close to one of my binges. Every so often, when I get really down, I just abuse the hell out of myself. Gorging on food, especially desserts, is one way. Some of you know exactly what I'm talking about. Drinking is another, although I don't really get drunk. It's more the fact that I have a beer or two in the evening, enough that I start to feel it, and I do that for a week straight. Hell, the past two mornings, I've wanted to stop and pick up a pack of Camels. I haven't done that in four years. I know it doesn't help, and it doesn't even feel good after a day or two. Frankly, I just don't give a shit.
I took down my New Jersey map. I had it tacked up on my cube wall, and had map pins in all the places I lived, where my relatives live, and towns I used to spend time in. A part of me just couldn't stand to look at it anymore. Then again, I also took down my Indiana map, so what does that prove?
I hate my job right now. We were told yesterday that for the next 10 weeks, at least, we will have to work overtime. I'm a salaried employee, so I don't get any extra pay. I don't know why I should knock myself out on this. There isn't a person in the company that thinks we'll get this out by the end of the year.
I go to the dentist tomorrow for a tooth extraction. Oh fucking joy.